Showdown With Ali Zafar
But all this was about to change.
I was in Lahore this past weekend for a friends wedding and on my flight back to Karachi, who should I encounter at the departure gate? None other than my nemesis
How it happened:
Upon seeing Ali Zafar I shouted..."Yo! Choot ass! I hear you been talking shit about me?!"
Ali Zafar then responded "Aunty Disco Bitch! I am going to rape you!"
I dropped my luggage and then ran towards him, while he dropped his teddy bear and hustled towards me delicately on his tippy toes. Face to face, we angrily confronted each other.
Ali Zafar: "Before this day is over, I am going to make you taste my wrath"
Me: "Before this day is over, I am going to make you taste my balls".
Then I wrestled him to the ground and beat him with my shoe while airport security cheered on.
How it really happened:
I was sitting at the departure gate when I saw a dude with a guitar case briskly walking towards the boarding are, and recognised him as Ali Zafar. Ali turned around and looked at me, and kinda cocked his head to the side and gave me a look of recognition. Then I got up to meet him, feeling slightly awkward, keeping in mind that I had previously accused him of several different types of STD's in my blog. So I walked up to him and gave him a man-hug then he looked at me and sincerely asked, "Why you got a problem with me bro?"
To which I sheepishly replied, "I dunno, I guess cuz' I thought you had a problem with me"
Ali looked hurt and said, "No man, why would I have a problem with you? I love you man..."
I smiled back, and choking back tears said "I love you too...man!"
Then we embraced in a passionate lip-lock and fell the to ground while airport security cheered on.
OK OK...so this is what really happened
So Ali and I met at the airport departure lounge and I gotta say, the guy is a complete gentleman. He was on his way to Karachi for Coke Studio and seemed genuinely excited about the whole thing. He mentioned that he'd heard our stuff and was really encouraging telling me to stick with it, because we'd all been through rejections and bad recordings. I really appreciated it and he really made me feel like I was part of this music industry fraternity.
It is also worth mentioning that I ran into Ali Noor the same weekend at a restaurant ( I guess Lahore really is pretty tiny) and he too was really encouraging and welcoming and seemed genuinely interested in what was going on with ADP. I know I've got a long way to go before I get to the level of these guys, but it was really nice to be acknowledged by people you look up to.
Both Ali Noor and Zafar are coming to Karachi to be a part of Coke Studio, along with our friends Zeb and Haniya. I guess I'm over my dissappointment at not making it this time, but I wish them all the best time in my city and I really am looking forward to seeing how it turns out. It sounds crazy exciting.
Does this mean I have to stop posting rumours about Ali Zafar on my blog? Well I thought about this, I don't think he'll mind, he's been an awfully good sport about this fake feud so far. But it is always going to be a little awkward meeting a guy who you have accused of sexual deviation on a public forum.